The World's Finest Team... JUST ANOTHER MUTHA-$%@&!-ING  TEAM-UP STORY
World's Finest #11 May, Year Four	by Bertram Gibbs

BATMAN

SUPERMAN

APOLLO

MIDNIGHTER

The office section of the warehouse was designed during the Zero Privacy period of American business. A large room with three desks, computers, printers, fax machines, file cabinets, and a bay window the length of the office, constructed to make sure that the illegal aliens (upgraded from the more friendly term, immigrants) who were working for less than minimum wage on whatever machinery that had originally filled the warehouse did not slow down production. Through the window you could see Spazinski’s dimensional portal and the four electrically charged cages that held the super-heroes. A perfect vantage point to observe an oncoming attack if the office’s occupants weren’t presently occupied.

On the left side of the office were Luthor’s men, standing at the ready with their automatic weapons, flanking their illustrious entrepreneur. Lex Luthor stood with his arms folded tightly behind his back, leaning forward on his toes speaking harshly to the Joker.

On the right side, the three tall muscular men who served under the Clown Prince of Crime stood weapons in hand, staring impassively at Luthor and his men. The Joker stood legs akimbo, his arms folded across his chest, grinning at Luthor, his jaw held high and aimed at the man’s head like a weapon.

No one took their eyes from the other’s. Not Luthor, not the Joker, not their men. No one dared. The only person who was looking out the office window was Myron Eugene Spazinski, because he really had no choice.

He watched his force fields shut off.

It was at that exact moment Myron Eugene Spazinski came to the realization that should you have a very swollen jaw that was filled with multiple fractures (which were originally multiple breaks), relaying audible information would be difficult at best.

“Mstrg Ootho!” he croaked.

Myron was propped up against the wall like an ironing board, his head tilted towards the bay window and at the row of cages. Every inch of his body ached with pain and his nerves still jumped at the joining of his other self. His head and shoulder pressed against the wall, his body a stiff straight line to the floor.

“Give me one good reason not to turn you into road kill,” said Luthor his eyes burning into the mad clown’s.

“Only one, Garibaldi?” Joker asked grinning madly. “Multiple answers too complex for you?”

Luthor took a step forward causing the Joker’s men to do likewise, which made Luthor’s men do the same. The room was filled with the sounds of safeties being flipped to the go-and-kill position. The Joker looked around at the decrease in his personal space.

“Getting’ mighty crowded ‘round here, Tex,” the Joker said in a Western twang.

Luthor took a step back, and the rest slowly back-stepped, following his lead.

“Now,” began the Joker who had pulled a deck of playing cards from his pocket and was shuffling them, “ignoring the fact that you’ve rejected my offer to join forces, enter the multiverses, take over and destroy them all (making you a big Poopy-Head), you have to admit that if it wasn’t for me . . . “

Myron watched as the four men regrouped and turned as one towards the warehouse office. Seconds earlier, the thought of movement (and the spasms of racking pain that immediately followed) had made him accept his currently immobile position. Seconds later, after he saw the expressions on the four heroes’ faces, hence abandoning his earlier decision, he found that no matter how much his mind told his body to run, it barely moved an inch in any direction. This brought forth his second realization of the day was that his life sucked the hairy moose schlong.

“Mstrg Ootho!!!” Myron Eugene Spazinski repeated, but with more urgency.

Joker sighed and rolled his eyes in an exasperated fashion. “And Myron helped too,” he said in a tired voice. “Anywho, if it wasn’t for us, we wouldn’t have the soon-to-be-late four Marx Brothers in the poky!” His eyes snapped to the side and narrowed at Spazinski, whose eyes began to blink rapidly in terror. “Which means you owe me,” he said with a shark-like grin. Joker turned back to Luthor and Myron exhaled in a thin rasp.

Spazinski eyes widened as he saw the four quickstep in their direction.

“MSTRG OOTHO!”

The Joker’s arm snapped out and a metal playing card with a razor sharp edge landed deftly between his thumb, middle and index finger. He held it up, ready to throw it between Spazinski’s eyes.

“It is so rude to interrupt,” Joker said, his eyes glaring at the man in the light blue spandex. “We’re trying to have a civil conversation and you with your constant . . . “

Two small red holes appeared in the center of the card and began to burn its way through. The Joker’s eyes - which snapped from Spazinski - widened slightly as card in his hand heated up. “That can’t be good,” he muttered dropping the card and sucking the tips of his gloves.

Everyone turned to the window just as Batman and Midnighter crashed through, followed by Apollo and Superman who ripped the walls away.

“PARTY TIME!” screamed the Joker as he whipped an Uzi from under his purple jacket and opened fire at his mortal enemy. Batman dove and shoulder rolled out of the way of the incoming fire and tossed a bat-a-rang at the Joker’s head. The Clown easily ducked and it stuck in the wall behind him.

“HAH!” he sneered as he aimed the site at Batman’s chest. “You missed!”

A small hint of a smile raised the corner of the Dark Knight’s mouth. The Joker’s eyes widened and he turned around. There was a small red light in the center of the projectile.

“Oh, no,” he whispered. The bat-a-rang exploded and sent a plume of white gas in his face. He choked, and staggered, and fell to his knees.

As Batman stalked towards him, one of Luthor’s men dove over a desk at his back. Batman spun on his heel, ready to hit the thug in midair, when Midnighter body-checked the aerial criminal into the wall of file cabinets.

“Let’s see,” said a voice from the floor and moving upwards. “A smidgen of black widow venom mixed with your own special sauce?”

Batman turned to see the Joker pulling himself to a standing position.

“Ivy and I have become good pals of late,” he said adjusting his jacket. “Her all purpose Bat-toxin cures all that ails ya! Maybe I can get it patented?”

His foot struck out and Batman caught it with both gloved hands. The Joker’s grin widened.

“Now I saw this bit in an old Jackie Chan movie!” he said. He shifted all his weight into the leg Batman held, making him bend forward slightly, then flipped his body and swung his free leg into the side of the Dark Knight’s head. Batman flew to one side, hit the side of a desk, then crumpled to the floor. “Or was that Jet Li?” the Joker mused.

Batman’s leg swept out striking the Joker’s ankles, sending him hard to the floor, pointed chin first. As soon as his jaw struck the hard floor, Batman dropped a heavily muscled leg against the back of the madman’s head, driving his face into the cracked wooden surface.

“No,” he said. “That was Chan.”

A thug sent a uppercut to Midnighter’s jaw, which would have connected if the masked man was anywhere near the man’s fist. Midnighter was now behind him and caught him on the jaw as he spun around. The man tried for a leg sweep, but the Midnighter’s left foot slammed down, keeping his ankle in place while he brought his right heel on the man’s knee, shattering the cap. The thug screamed and sent an adrenaline-powered fist towards the crime fighter’s lower extremities. Midnighter easily caught the man’s arm, pulled him up sharply and into a hard elbow, breaking his nose. The man stepped back in time to meet Apollo’s waiting hand, which grabbed him by the back of his jacket and calmly tossed him over his shoulder like a empty bag of chips. The thug’s flight was stopped by three of Lex Luthor’s men, who were rushing forwards to tackle Apollo from behind.

Apollo reached out and grabbed one of the hulking Joker goons by the front of his jacket, lifted him and brought him to eye level. He locked eyes with the man and rose into the air. The hood looked down at the rapidly retreating floor, then to the oncoming ceiling. They stopped just inches before they both collided with the crossbeam holding up the roof.

“Just to let you know,” he said in a kind friendly voice. “This is gonna hurt.” He quickly brought his arm up, sending the man headfirst into the roof, then threw him like a softball at a desk below.

The remaining two of the Joker’s posse were moving crab-like around the Man of Steel, who stood his ground, waiting for them to make their move. The one on his right darted forward and sent a haymaker to Superman’s jaw. He saw the glimpse of a smile as Superman disappeared from view. His forward momentum carried his fist to the jaw of his partner, who sudden appeared in front of him. The second hood’s head snapped back and his dark glasses flipped off his face.

He glared at his partner and the profanity-laced response froze in his throat. The hood stared at the reflection in his partner’s glasses and saw Superman standing directly behind him. He pivoted at the hip and sent a fast right cross to the hero’s jaw. The loud cracking sound of his knuckles breaking made anyone in earshot (and weren’t preoccupied with their own personal battles) winch.

Superman reached out and grabbed the man by the shirtfront, then snatched the other with his free hand before he could back away.

“Let this be a lesson to you,” Superman said firmly. “Choose your employers wisely.”

And with that, he spun in place at sixty M.P.H. for a full minute before slowing down to release them. Both men crumpled to the floor, their eyes rattling in their heads.

Meanwhile, at the far side of the long room, Lex Luthor stood next to the water cooler, sipping calmly from a paper cup.

Midnighter turned to Apollo, his hands raised and ready to reach out and pummel someone. “Who’s next?” he asked, grinning.

A shot rang out and a bullet hole appeared in the upper right chest area of his leather coat. He wobbled on his heels and fell back.

“MIDNIGHTER!” screamed Apollo.

Everyone froze.

Batman held the Joker up from the floor by the front of his jacket. His lips parted slightly in shock. Superman dropped the unconscious hood he was holding and was already moving forward for assistance. Apollo’s head snapped around at the hood he had sent crashing to the desk. The man was bracing himself against a file cabinet, and was holding a nine-millimeter in his hand. He wore a dazed but very satisfied grin.

Apollo took several steps forward, only stopping when he was directly in front of the hood. “Mother fucker,” he rasped as he drove his hand forward and through the hood’s chest. The man’s face went white, his eyes bulging and his mouth wide open. Apollo pulled his hand out roughly and held the man’s heart in front of his eyes. The hood’s next-to-last vision before he left the world of the living was his still beating heart in Apollo’s hand. The last thing he saw was Apollo crushing it into pulp, its blood running through his fingers and down his wrist.

“NOOOOO!” screamed Batman, dropping the Joker and diving for Apollo’s throat.

Superman got there first and sent a roundhouse punch to the golden crime fighter’s jaw. The hero’s feet left the floor and he crashed into a wall. The Man of Steel lifted him by the front of his white tunic and back and fore handed him several times, his eyes wild and glowing red. Apollo’s hand tightened into a fist and sent a punch from the floor to Superman’s jaw, sending him up and through the roof. Seconds later, Superman crashed through another section of the roof and power dove straight into Apollo’s midsection. He flew across the room and landed heavily on the floor.

Batman stalked to the fallen hero when a hand grasped him roughly by the shoulder.

“Let him alone, fucker,” Midnighter growled.

Batman stared.

“He must’ve forgot I brought the Kevlar,” he said as an explanation.

Batman’s face hardened. “That makes it worse,” he growled, staring darkly into the Midnighter’s eyes. Apollo swooped past but he didn’t acknowledge it. “He killed a man for nothing!” He sent a hard fist to the man’s jaw, but Midnighter had already sidestepped and sent his own fist to Batman’s solar plexus. Batman swatted it away like a pesky insect.

Midnighter backed away from a sweeping right and caught Batman on the chin with a left hook. Batman rolled with the punch and sent a side kick to the man’s knee, but Midnighter had already moved inside the kick and sent a punch to the crime fighter’s kidneys, dropping him to one knee. Midnighter grinned and kicked Batman in the stomach. He began to circle him.

Luthor took that moment to walk calmly over to where the Joker was getting to his feet and pointed at Myron. Both men grabbed Spazinski by each arm and drag/walked him in the direction of the dimensional portal.

“You’ve had this coming,” Midnighter said. “I’m so fucking tired of your high and mighty, badass, I’ve-got-bigger-balls-than-you attitude.”

Batman got to his feet and stood in the center of the circle Midnighter was making, his cape draped over his shoulders. “And I’m tired of your senseless killing, but we do not have time for this,” he said. He began to walk around him.

“You’re making time for me, bitch,” Midnighter snarled, stepping in his way.

Batman’s eyes locked on the backs of Luthor, the Joker and Spazinski. His eyes canted towards Midnighter.

“I know many like you,” Batman said. “Angry at the injustice, angry at the senselessness of the crimes, and angry at being unable to stop it all. But no matter what happened, they knew where to draw the line. You don’t. And now we have to stop . . . “

Midnighter’s gloved hand shot out, but Batman calmly deflected it.

“Fine,” he said reaching into his belt underneath his flowing cape. He shrugged both shoulders and suddenly raised his right hand. Midnighter easily reached out and grabbed his wrist in a vice-like grip. Batman quickly lifted his other hand and squeezed the pellet he held between his fingers and a brilliant white flash erupted between them. Midnighter screamed and backed away blinking rapidly, trying to clear the large spots from his eyes.

Batman sent a fist into the man’s stomach, doubling him over, then a shot to the chin, and a hard wheel kick to his jaw, snapping his head and sending him to the ground.

“J’onn told me you’re genetically altered to predict your opponent’s next ten moves,” Batman said to the back of his head. “Hard to envisage what you cannot see.”

A prickling on the back of his neck made him spin around to see Apollo flying towards him, an angry scowl on his face. Superman was coming up fast behind him. Batman dove to the ground as Superman increased his speed, passed Apollo, scooped Midnighter up by his armpits, then spun and threw him directly at his oncoming partner. Both men crashed into each other and down to the floor.

Batman’s wrist reared back and he sent a spinning bat-a-rang directly at the head of the Joker. The clown went flying forward, pulling Myron with him, both of them skidding to a halt in front of the portal.

Superman dove in an arc, grabbed Luthor by his jacket and jerkily lifted him off the floor and flew to the top of the structure. His angry eyes glowed red as he stared at the multi-billionaire in unchecked hatred.

“Put me down,” he protested calmly. “And then leave. And take your friends with you,” he added.

Superman mouth dropped open just the slightest bit, but enough to allow Luthor to know (with great satisfaction) that he got the Man of Steel again.

“Yes,” he said through a dark smile, “I know. ‘Luthor, I’ve got you now!’, right? Do you really?” He glanced at the distance between his shoes ($4,000.00) and the floor. He looked back at Superman. He raised his index finger between their eyes and turned it in the direction of the floor. “Down?”

Superman scowled and slowly descended. When he touched ground, Midnighter and Apollo had reached Batman, who was roughly cuffing the Joker’s hands behind his back. Spazinski was slowly and painfully pulling himself up to a sitting position.

Batman spun and stopped on a dime in front of the Midnighter, glaring at him, waiting for him to do something that fell under the classification of very stupid.

Midnighter stepped up and went nose to nose with the Dark Knight. After several tense seconds, he allowed a smirk and a nod, then stepped around him and pulled Myron to his feet.

“You were right,” he said over his shoulder. “We didn’t have time for it.”

Batman turned to glare at Apollo. “You killed someone,” he rasped. “For no good reason!”

Apollo shrugged. “I overreacted,” he said simply.

Superman released Luthor and stepped in between Apollo and Batman in an eye blink. He turned to face the silver haired man.

“You have to pay for that,” he said.

“Not in my world,” Apollo replied.

“You’re not in your world!” snapped Batman.

“So let me get this right,” said the Midnighter. “The people who kill and maim the innocents in this world are just sent to jail or the psyche ward? You don’t execute them?”

“There are few cases where executions are performed,” said Superman, his face shifting uncomfortably.

“But aside from those ‘few cases’, the ones you put away escape and do it all over again, right?” asked Apollo, staring directly into Superman’s eyes. “So you capture them. And you put them back in the place they escaped from. And they get out. And the circle keeps spinning. You keep the circle spinning!”

Before Superman could even think to reply, Midnighter muttered, “Sort of a fucked up way to insure job security.”

Batman turned to the masked man. “We have a code,” he said. “We do not take a life.”

“To do so,” added the Man from Krypton, “makes us no better than the people we are trying to stop.”

“We have a code, too!” snapped Apollo. “It’s called an eye for an eye!” His face moved an inch closer to Superman’s. “Maybe you’ve heard of it?”

“And where is the justice for the families?” asked Midnighter. His voice was uncharacteristically emotional. You could hear the tears that were being held back.

Batman lowered his head. “We have to believe in our legal system,” he said softly. His hand shot out from under his cape and released a wire with weights at its ends that flew across the room towards the warehouse exit and wrapped itself around Luthor’s legs, sending him crashing to the ground.

“Then let me ask you a question,” said Apollo. “How many lives need to be destroyed? How many dead and mangled bodies do you have to see before you realize your precious legal system ISN’T FUCKING WORKING?!?!”

Superman opened his mouth, then shut it. From an outsider’s view, they were right. They didn’t see the changes that were being made. They did not see old and forgotten laws being removed because it targeted a certain religious belief or nationality. They did not see the courts reviewing existing laws and amending them to fit our present sociological status. They did not see new laws that were created to benefit all who are in need of justice.

But the truth of the matter was that no matter how much progress had been made in the judicial system throughout the years, the system - even at its best - wasn’t perfect, and there was still a lot of work to be done. And until mankind reached that point in their existence when the term ‘injustice’ was looked upon as archaic, he and Bruce would put on the uniform and fight the good fight, doing whatever . . .

But still . . .

Superman glanced over to Batman, who still had his head lowered. He knew they were sharing the same thoughts. How many more people have to die before they can hang up their uniforms knowing that justice is being done?

Too easy an answer, thought Batman. Just kill them and stop the carnage. How many times had he considered such an action? Too many. And each time he did, he saw the look of pain and fear in his parents’ faces as the bullets struck. It was a look he had seen every night of his life since their deaths. And that is what stopped him from performing that action. He had come close; too close on several occasions. Some involved the grinning psychopath at his feet. But he couldn’t; no, wouldn’t stoop to their levels. To do so would be a crime.

You’re not in your world . . .

“We file this under cultural differences,” said Batman finally. “You leave and never come back.”

Midnighter and Apollo nodded. Apollo lifted the free side of Myron and dragged him over to the dimensional portal.

“We have to take this with us, you know,” said Apollo.

“Evidence,” added Midnighter.

“I’m surprised you have trials,” muttered Batman sarcastically.

“Right before the execution,” replied Midnighter, smiling sardonically.

“Angie?” said Apollo. Superman exchanged a brief glance with Batman. Apollo caught their look and shot them a wink. “Angie?” he repeated. “Can you read me?” A small beatific smile shown on his face as he appeared to receive a response. “Good to hear you, too, sweetheart. Door, please.”

With that, a large rectangle glowing with golden energy appeared in front of them. Luthor had extricated himself from the Batman’s bolo and had returned to where the heroes were, taking the barest of glances at the glowing portal.

“You’re still here?” he asked in an imperious tone. He looked at Superman. “I would have thought you would have given them the message.”

Before Superman could respond a tall voluptuous woman walked through the shimmering passageway. It wasn’t her incredible beauty that made the Man of Steel do a double-take; it was because the woman’s skin and hair looked like it was made of metal. The fact that she looked completely naked didn’t help matters.

Batman did not react. He simply stared in silence.

She looked around, saw Apollo and rushed towards him, smiling. He picked her up by the waist and held her above his head as one would do a small child. When he put her down, she saw Midnighter, then saw Batman standing next to him. Her head went to one face and then the other. Her eyes slid and she saw Superman staring at her. When her eyes met his, he gave her a warm smile. Unaccustomed to such an open display of immediate friendliness, Angie, the Engineer, could do nothing but smile back. Her eyes shifted and she was caught in Lex Luthor’s gaze. Her back arched slightly feeling his eyes scan every inch of her body.

“What are you looking at, dickhead?” she snapped.

Luthor’s eyes, which were not on hers, rose and his face broke into a smile. He stepped forward, reached out and grasped her hand.

“Lex Luthor,” he said in a deep melodious tone. “At your service.” He bent forward and kissed the back of her silver gray knuckles.

Her eyes narrowed in suspicion. She glanced at Midnighter, who nodded. She turned back to Luthor just as he was straightening up.

“Now that’s interesting,” she said.

“What, pray tell?” he asked with a seductive smile.

“For a moment,” she began, “When you kissed my hand, you know, looking a the top of your head, it reminded me of an after dinner snack I had last night.”

You could hear a pin drop in the warehouse.

Luthor’s jaw dropped and he paled.

Superman blushed.

Apollo and Midnighter made a short snorting sound.

Batman stared, though the corner of his lip rose about a sixteenth of an inch.

The Joker broke the silence with a raucous cackle.

Angie spun, seeing the madman for the first time because he was behind her when she entered through the door. A small chill filled her chest as his eyes ran up and down her body like spiders, then rose and locked on hers.

“Oh, please tell me you come with a can opener,” the Joker sighed, fluttering his eyelashes.

“You’re fucked up,” she said.

“And a sweet talker to boot!” he cooed.

“Take the dimensional portal and store it in the lab,” said Apollo. “I know Jack is going to want to take a look at that thing.”

“Don’t break it,” moaned Myron from his curled position on the floor.

The Engineer’s eyes turned hard. “What we do to that thing should be the least of your worries, you piece of shit!”

Spazinski’s eyes matched hers. “If it wasn’t for you stupid fucking do-gooders, you’d all be licking my ass right now!”

Midnighter’s hand shot out and grabbed Spazinski by the throat and lifted him to eye level.

“Not the best way to endear yourself, fuckhead,” he whispered and reared his head back and brought it forward sharply, slamming it against Spazinski’s nose and breaking it. Myron screamed and rivulets of blood ran from each nostril. He whimpered through bloody hands as he was roughly tossed into the arms of the Engineer.

“We’ll be right behind you,” said Apollo. “Got to tie up a few loose ends.” He glanced at Batman and shot her a wink.

Angie frowned and rolled her eyes. “I don’t want to know, okay?” she said. Her hand morphed into wrist cuffs and molded it around Myron’s hands. “Come on, lover,” she said. “You’ve got a date with an open cavity search.”

Myron’s already ashen complexion paled. The Engineer put a sinister smile on her malleable metal face.

“Sorry,” she said. “That’s the SOP for all new prisoners.”

She turned and began dragging a gasping and shrieking Myron through the door. Midnighter rushed over, lightly tapped her on the shoulder, halting her, and whispered something in her ear. Angie’s face was blank as she nodded to him, then continued through the shimmering opening dragging Spazinski behind her. Seconds later a beam of green light poured from the doorway and encased itself around the dimensional portal. The machine rose two feet above the floor and was slowly pulled through the waiting door and out of sight.

“That’s . . . the search is part of your procedure?” asked Superman, who was trying not to imagine said procedure, and failing.

“No,” answered Apollo. “Just something she likes doing . . . “

“And is good at,” added the Midnighter.

“And it sort of sets the guidelines,” said Apollo, who winked at Batman.

Batman stared.

“Now where were we?” interjected Luthor. “Oh, yes. You were leaving.” He glared at Batman. “You! Take that grinning idiot out of here!” He turned to Midnighter and Apollo. “You two! Go back to wherever you came from.” His eyes turned to Superman. “And you,” he said darkly. “You know where to go.”

Superman took a step forward, then stopped and exhaled deeply.

“Like I said, Superman,” Luthor said smiling, “I understand. You’re having a difficult time dealing with the fact that I beat you again.” He chuckled deeply in his chest. “I can see that little alien mind of your ticking away. What can I charge him with? Conspiring to take over the multiverses? Using dimensional devices without a license?” He walked to where the dimensional portal had rested. “And where is the evidence? And whom are you going to use as witnesses? These heroes from another dimension?” he asked, holding out his arms towards Apollo and Midnighter. “Him?” he asked, hooking a finger at Batman.

Batman stared.

“You have nothing,” said Luthor. “And you are all trespassing.” His eyes darkened. “Get off my property.”

Midnighter turned to Batman. “Is he right?” he asked.

Batman continued to stare at Luthor, but nodded once.

“And you two can’t do anything?” asked Apollo incredulously.

Superman shook his head. “Our justice system,” he said in a flat voice.

“That’s fucked!” sighed Midnighter.

“Welcome to our world, sweetheart!” said the Joker.

“Now that we have completed our lessons on this world’s judicial system,” said Luthor standing with his arms folded across his chest, “are you leaving, or do I have to call the police and have you ejected?”

The Joker began to chuckle.

The Midnighter and Apollo looked at each other. Midnighter turned away, then spun on his heel and sent a roundhouse right to Luthor’s jaw, then caught him on the side of the face with a hard left. Lex Luthor’s body snapped one way, then went sharply to the other side. He tilted back and forth on the sides of his shoes, his brain trying to decide which was the correct way fall. Midnighter shot a jab to Luthor’s nose, breaking it, and sending him flying backwards to the floor.

The Joker’s eyes bulged and he looked at Batman and Superman.

“Aren’t you going to do something?” he asked. “Aren’t you going to stop him?”

“Stop who?” asked Batman.

“Who are we stopping?” asked Superman. “Heroes from another universe who won’t be here by the time the police show up?”

“And who is going to be a credible witness?” asked Batman smiling darkly. “You?”

The Joker’s wide eyes slid over to Apollo, who was standing directly in front of him. The Joker offered a wide friendly (for him) smile. Apollo smiled back.

“Yeah,” he said. “You’re fucked.”

Apollo fired a short blast of solar energy from his eyes, striking the Joker in the forehead. The mad clown flew back several feet in the air, landed hard, skidded backwards on his posterior several feet, then tilted and rolled across the floor, stopping only when he hit the warehouse wall. The Joker shot to his feet, albeit unsteadily, and opened his mouth to say something when his eyes suddenly rolled back in his head, his legs became the consistency of tapioca and he slid quietly to the floor.

“Now that we’re alone,” began Apollo, “Thank you for your help.”

He held out his hand to Superman. The Man of Steel stared at it for a beat, then grasped it.

“I understand what you do,” he said. “I just feel you go too far in doing it.”

“We think you don’t go far enough,” said Midnighter.

“We agree to disagree,” said Batman. “Goodbye. Don’t come back.”

Apollo glanced over at Midnighter, turned back to Batman and smiled. “I love when you play hard to get,” he said.

Two sets of eyes snapped to Batman and Apollo.

Batman stared. “One, I am hard to get,” he said. “Two; I’m straight. Three; you are not going to use me as a payback to Midnighter for whatever your reasons are. Leave.”

Superman’s saucer-sized eyes jiggled in his head and his jaw hinge became very relaxed.

Apollo’s gray eyes stared at Batman. He pursed his lips and held his elbow in one hand while the other contemplatively cupped his chin. Midnighter walked over to him and rested his hand on his partner’s shoulder. “He’s good,” he said.

“He’s very good,” replied Apollo nodding.

“That’s our cue,” mentioned Midnighter. “Let’s go home.”

Apollo stood in front of Batman and Midnighter in front of Superman. Both men exchanged handshakes and nods of respect. Apollo shot a glance at Midnighter, who grinned back. Apollo and Midnighter suddenly reached out, grabbed both men by the side of their heads and pulled themselves forward. Apollo planted a kiss on Batman’s mouth, while Midnighter applied the same lip lock to Superman. Both heroes from another world stepped back and walked through the shimmering door.

“Let us know when you’re ready to come out!” cried Apollo over his shoulder.

The sides of the glowing portal folded inward in sections. First in half, then in quarters, then it vanished in a bright flash of sparkling light.

Immobile as statues, Superman and Batman stared in silence at the spot where the door had been. Neither man moved. No tic or random muscle movement registered on their faces. They just stared.

“How did you know?” asked Superman quietly.

“By observing,” replied Batman. “By not automatically assuming.”

“Oh,” said Superman in a small voice.

They returned to their mutual silence.

“Not a word of this to Lois,” said Superman.

“Not a word of this to anyone,” answered Batman.

Their silence filled the warehouse for several seconds. Simultaneously, both men’s spines stiffened. Slowly, two heads began to turn on their respective necks towards each other. While Superman’s face wore an expression of grim concern, Batman’s just showed grim (well, more than usual).

“Wally,” they said in unison.

To Be Concluded…