She stalked the streets, nervous at what she would find out. As she entered into the pharmacy she was greeted by a worker whose nametag said “Gladys”. Gladys was very bothersome to the woman, continuously asking if she was finding everything all right. As she made her way to the…“unspeakable” test aisle, she went past all the cheap stuff.

I want this to be legit, she thought to herself. After Gladys bothered her for the last time, the woman placed the twenty-five plus dollar test into her green hoodie. She asked herself how did a small town Baptist girl get herself into this situation. There was the possible pregnancy on the one hand, but now thievery?

I can’t feel upset about this, she thought, Eel has done a lot for this city. This is like a payback…maybe?

She didn’t know why she was ashamed, she just felt…dirty. She wanted to get out of her skin and there was no way she was going to pay for a pregnancy test! She slowly walked out of the store, looking rather suspicious to everyone, but to her, she was normal for a person who had just stolen something for the first time.

Penny Powers was petrified as to what she would find, but she knew something had to be done.

Plastic Man The Pliable Paladin.....

Baby on Board Pt 2 (of 2)
Plastic Man #12 - September, Year Four By Dan Ballard


It was only the afternoon, and Eel O’Brien had had two fights of the day. He thought it felt like his old days with his gang, only when he was there, there was a lot more cursing and beer bottles being flung and shattered everywhere.

As Eel wrestled in the brush behind his apartment building, he felt a snug wrap around his neck. After the wrap had fully gotten around his neck, an elastic hand was used to poke Eel repeatedly in the eyes. Eel screamed in annoyance.

“That…is…it!” While his attacker was able to get a wrap on things, Eel was better. He soon put his attacker in the same position Eel was just in. Eel had flipped his attacker onto his back and stared at who his enemy was. He stared into the eyes of…a boy, no older then seventeen. It was exactly as Eel was at that age. And how he was in his fifties, but who was counting?

“Who are you?” he questioned him.

“I’m…” the boy gasped for air, as Eel gritted his teeth in anticipation.

Sue Dibney had just lost her husband. If ever there was a bad time to talk to someone else about their problems, it was now. Penny Powers sat in quietness as Sue stared at her.

“Penny,” Sue began, “Didn’t you say you wanted to talk about something over the phone?”

“Um…yes. Yes, Sue. But…um…I just don’t…quite know how to say it.”

“Just spit it ou--”

“Can I use your bathroom?” The question took Sue by surprise. All this awkwardness for a bathroom? It didn’t make sense. Something was definitely up.

“Um, first door to the left,” she said pointing the way to the hall.


Eel wasn’t used to being so serious, but when he fights an adversary that’s identical to him in many aspects, even he loses his ‘happy-go-lucky’ temperament. Jeez, he thought, This must be what Batman feels like all the time.

“Who are you?!”

The attacker coughed. “I’ll tell ya if you would get offa me!” he said through various breaths. Eel blushed from embarrassment for a minute and then released his strong grip on the boy.

“Who—“ the boy spit on him, the saliva hitting the nose.

“What the—“

“Why’d you leave me? Why’d you leave us?!” Eel had never been more astonished in his entire life. Was he implying something?

“Excuse me? ‘Us’? Who’s ‘us’?”

“You ARE an idiot. Me and mom!”

“Hey who’re you calling a—MOM?!” Eel screamed in astonishment.

“How is that old bag alive? If I’m ninety then that would have to make her…” Eel began to count his fingers, growing more ‘fingers’ as he ran out of them. The boy just looked at him in confusion.

“What are you doing?”

“Didn’t you just say that our mom’s alive?”

“Not OUR mom. My mom, you nut!”

“Then what are you talking—oh.” Eel had a solemn face on.

How to explain THIS to Penny.


Thirty minutes is long enough, Sue thought to herself stamping her foot as she stood by her bathroom door.

“Penny, did you want to talk or…” The door opened, with Penny’s wearied face.

“Honey?”

“Um…actually Sue, I’d like to ask you about…what’s it like to marry a superhero?” she asked, tears streaming down her face.


From fighting in the bushes to sitting on the curb having a ‘man to man’. Sort of. Eel tried talking with the boy as if he were still three-years-old, which did not settle well for the boy.

“You see, there comes a time when a mommy and a daddy find they have nothing in com—“

“Will you just SHUT UP?!” screamed the boy.

Talk about disrespect, was Eel’s initial thought.

“What-“

“I’m seventeen, you numbskull! My birthday’s August 7th, and my name’s Luke. Luke O’Brien!”

Aw, that’s my birthday, Eel thought with happiness.

“Now that we have the basics down, I want to know: why did you leave us?”

”First I need to know who the other person is in ‘us’.” That statement hit the boy harder then Eel had even expected. Actually, he never expected to even make an imprint.

“Mom’s…not the only one you’ve…” his voice trailed.

Obviously, this boy’s never been on the streets, thought Eel, placing a hand over his frustrated face.


“Well, it’s wonderful,” started Sue, reliving great memories of her husband Ralph, or as he was known to the world, the Elongated Man. “The security, love. But…”

Penny didn’t like that ‘but’.

“It’s…it’s not all fun and games. They leave one minute,” this is where her voice became weary, “and…they might never come back to you.” Here come the tears, Sue thought feeling the water accumulating in her eyes. She thought of the image of her dead husband, frozen thanks to the Weather Wizard.

“I’m sorry,” Penny said.

“No. It’s all right. I’m fine.” Sue took a tissue and dabbed her eyes dry.

“But tell me,” she began, “why is it that you want to get married? I mean, you’ve only dated for—what is it--three months?”

Penny just sat there and gave no response. She was ashamed for some reason, so she didn’t answer her friend. Taking one last sip of the tea in front of her, she arose.

“Thank you, Sue. I’ll…see my way out.” Penny left, leaving Sue with only herself, and bitter memories.


Eel was having no luck with this kid. First he fights him, then he finds out he has a son, and then he has to explain that he’s been with other women other then his son’s mother.

“Gonna need a beer after this one,” Eel said under his breath. This was not his day at all.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Eel rubbed his temples in aggravation.

“Kid,” he began, “What’s you mom’s name?”

“Bernice.”

‘Bernice’. The name rang in Eel’s head until finally…

“Oh! Bernice! I remember now! Cute little brunette who used to—“ Eel stopped and looked over at the boy. “Uh…make eggs with pepper?” He said trying to cover up the inappropriate part of his description.

“But mom hates pepp--“

“Moving on!” Eel yelled in nervousness.

“How is your mom, anyway?”

“Well, after her parents kicked her out of the house for getting pregnant,”

Ouch.

“She had to take up five jobs,”

Double ouch.

“Now she’s been depressed saying that superheroes made the world a terrible place and she eats to quell her depression.”

Oh, c’mon, this can’t all be my fault! Could it?

“Why’d you leave us?”

“Kid, I didn’t even know you existed until you attacked me, which, by the way, you never explained.”

“Uh…you first.”

“That’s my boy,” Eel said with a smile on his face, proud that his son knew how to avoid trouble.

“Eel?” Eel had never been more happy and nervous to hear that voice in all his life. He looked over trying to hide the boy he sat next to by expanding himself.

“Hi sweetie! I thought you’d be upstairs. You weren’t feelin’ so hot last I saw you.”

‘Hey! Who’s the chick!’

‘Quiet, you!’

“Excuse me?”

“Nothing!” He had a grin on that gave away his actions. He was hiding something and Penny knew it, but she had more important news than whatever he was doing.

“Patrick, I need to ask you something.” Eel’s ears perked up.

“What’s up, honey?”

“I…want you to marry me.” He was taken aback by the question not responding at first.

“I—“

“Before you say anything else, I need to tell you something, too.”

Oh, great.

“Eel…I’m…the test came out positive.” Eel just stared at her with a confused look. She went into her bag and pulled a pregnancy test out. Eel then knew what she was talking about.

“Oh,” his tone made Penny squirm a little in her stomach. By the way he sounded, he was not happy at all. But, things aren’t always as they seem.

”That’s wonderful. And I accept your proposal. I’ll marry you!” Penny’s face grew in delight as she ran to the man she loved. She wrapped her arms around him tightly.

“Cool, a brother or sister AND a new mom!”

Penny released Eel and tried looking behind him, but he continued to block her view. 

“Now there’s something I have to tell you,” he said. She didn’t know whether to be happy or sad…or worried. He stepped out of the way and showed her a boy.

“This is Luke. He’s my…he’s OUR son.” Penny’s face grew wide in surprise as Luke kindly waved to her, a silly grin on his face. The gesture reminded her of Eel.

“Oh. Well, hi Luke. I’m Penny. But you can call me—“

“Mom!” Luke yelled as he wrapped his arms around Penny. Eel quickly released him of it and brought Luke’s head to his.

“Wait, where’s your mom, anyway?”

“Oh, did I…uh…forget to mention it? I’m stayin’ with you.” Penny and Eel’s faces grew wide in disbelief.

“And, why is that, Luke?”

“Because…uh…mom made it big in Hollywood.”

“The way you made it sound, she was on the brink of suicide.”

“Is that how I mentioned it? Couldn’t be! I would never…” Eel just stared at his son with a look of dissatisfaction.

”Ok, maybe I stretched the truth a teensy bit,” stated Luke, placing his index finger and thumb close to each other, but not touching.

“All right. I’ll show you your room.”

“Eel, you can’t be serious!”

”He’s my son. I gotta make it up to him.” Penny couldn’t argue with that. She’d been through enough today and was rather tired from everything. So she followed Eel and Luke to the apartment.


Luke stared in awe of his room. It was a lot bigger than the one he once inhabited.

“Wow.”

“Hey if you’re impressed with this, wait till you see the JLA Watchtower.”

“I can just go up?”

“Of course not! What’re you, crazy? Bats would kill me,” he said, shaping his head into that of Batman’s.

“Where has everyone been?!” in came Michael, the ghost boy. “I’ve been waiting for dinner for like, five hours! I’m starved!”

Eel looked at his victim from years back in confusion.

“Michael, you’re dead, remember?”

“Yeah, I know,” he said tapping his intangible index fingers together. “I just like the interaction.”

“Mm, dinner would be heavenly now. Eel honey, could you cook up some more of that fish stuff?”

“We ate it all at breakfast.”

“But I want it NOW!” she screamed. Luke, Eel, and Michael cowered. “I’m sorry,” she began, tears of remorse flowing, “It’s just that I’m—“ and here came the nausea.

“Hold that thought.” She ran for her bathroom, and the noise of vomiting could be heard from the other room.
“The perfect way to describe this day,” Eel said, with an agreeable nod from everyone else.


End



AUTHOR's NOTES

STRETCHING THE TRUTH

Hey everyone. Thus ends the first story arc of Plastic Man. Hope everyone enjoyed the shock and awe of this issue as much as the last. Surprisingly enough, I did indeed get fanmail from Patrick Moore:

Pumpkinhead Review's: Plastic Man # 11

      To me Plastic Man is the comedian of the JLA and the DCU.  I like the JLU 2001 version.  PM # 11 continues the feel of what Bertrum Gibbs has done in the past, with a mix of Kyle Baker's DC Comics run.

      The dialogue with Plas and Penny is gold, and the whole evil Plas is an all-new level.  I like to see Agent Morgan and Woozy Winks in the new run, and maybe that Goth chick from Kyle's comic.

      Too bad the comic got cancelled though.  Thank goodness for TPB.

      I give Plastic Man # 11 ****

 -Patrick Moore

Thanks for the kind words, Patrick. And four *’s! Woozy will be making a cameo in the next arc, possibly. Not a big role, but a role nonetheless.

Anyway, thanks for those who have enjoyed reading this, and again thanks to Patrick for the kind words and Curt for letting me write this title.

Dan Ballard


Dan Ballard



Story © 2006 DAN BALLARD and may not be reproduced without permission.